Yesterday was my brothers Birthday and I was sitting here this morning wishing I had a slice of cake because the piece my sister sent my family isn’t a flavor I usually eat but its better and nothings so I will be grateful and eat it. I just have one question. Do you have a glass of Milk I could have. I haven’t made it to the store to get any.
In the meantime I wanted to remind you for my family there are desserts we eat, and then there are desserts that take us right back to our childhood. For me, German chocolate cake will always remind me of my Grandma Dory. And if you think I’m talking about just any German chocolate cake, let me stop you right there. I’m talking about the old-fashioned kind she made for my birthday, with that coconut icing cooked just the way she did it. Because once you’ve had Grandma Dory’s German chocolate cake, it’s hard to settle for anything else!
When I was growing up, birthdays meant a special cake. My Grandma Dorie would make mine, and I always wanted German chocolate cake. Back then, you could buy a German chocolate baking bar with the recipe printed inside the wrapper. That’s the recipe she used, and I can still picture her standing over the stove, cooking the icing.
She didn’t just open a container and spread some icing over a cake. She stood there and cooked it, including the coconut, until it was the way it was supposed to be. That cooked coconut made all the difference to me and its what made me fall in love with the cake.
Nowadays, when I buy German chocolate cake, I often find that the coconut in the icing hasn’t been cooked the way Grandma Dorie cooked hers. I take a bite, get that texture I don’t like, and end up spitting it out. I know that might sound picky, but what can I say? I was spoiled by my grandmother’s cooking! Her cake wasn’t just dessert. It was part of my birthday, part of my childhood, and part of what made those celebrations special.
One year, Grandma Dorie was sick, so my mom and my Aunt Bobby decided they would make my birthday cake instead. It was a sweet thing for them to do. They wanted me to have my special cake even though Dorie couldn’t make it herself. But there was one little problem.
They didn’t cook the coconut in the icing the way Grandma did. The icing wasn’t warm, either. They poured lukewarm icing over the cake, and let me tell you, that was no bueno for me! I appreciated the effort, but it just wasn’t Grandma Dory’s German chocolate cake.
Another year, my sister decided to make one for me. She did the best she could, and she cooked the icing a little. But it still wasn’t cooked nearly as much as Grandma’s. By then, I should probably have learned that not everybody makes German chocolate cake the way my grandmother did. But when you grow up loving something made a certain way, it’s hard not to compare every version that comes afterward.
Of course, I also know that my family members were trying to do something kind for me. They wanted to make my birthday special, and that counts for something, too. Now, here’s where the story gets funny. One year, my sister made that German chocolate cake, and we had it sitting on the table.
Charlie was only about three or four years old because we were still living over off Stanley Keller. Somehow, Charlie found that cake. And what did he do? He took it under the kitchen table and ate all of it! The whole cake! I guess Charlie approved of my sister’s German chocolate cake, even if I wasn’t entirely convinced. LOL!
Apparently, he wasn’t worried about whether the coconut had been cooked long enough or whether the icing was warm. He found a cake, he liked it, and he went to town. I can just imagine discovering him under that table, enjoying his little feast. It’s one of those family stories that makes me laugh when I think about it. So, I suppose I should give my sister’s cake a little more credit. Charlie certainly wasn’t complaining!
You might think German chocolate cake was just a birthday tradition for me, but it also made an appearance on my wedding day. When David and I got married, we had German chocolate cake for our wedding cake. It might not have been the traditional choice everyone would expect, but that’s what David asked for, and that’s what we had.
My sister-in-law Lynn, who has since passed away, made the cake for us. There was just one thing missing from that cake: the icing wasn’t made the way Grandma Dorie made hers. It was already-prepared icing, so the coconut wasn’t cooked the way I liked it.
I even took some cake to my dad. The first thing he said was, “Where’s the nuts?” Now, here’s the funny part. My dad didn’t eat nuts because they bothered his teeth, but he still noticed that the icing was missing them! And I had to agree with him. Not only was the coconut not cooked the way I liked it, but the icing wasn’t quite right, either.
But you know what? It was our wedding day. Lynn had made the cake in the design I wanted, and she took the time to make it for us. I was grateful for that. Lynn isn’t here today, and I miss her. When I think about that wedding cake now, I don’t want to remember only what was missing from the icing. I want to remember that she made it for us and helped make our wedding day special. Sometimes, the things we complain about in the moment become the very details we laugh about or look back on differently years later.
Now, if somebody wants to make me a German chocolate cake today, I certainly wouldn’t turn it down! I’d be grateful, thankful, and blessed to have someone take the time to make one for me. I’d even share it with my best friend Debbie and David. But I do have one little request. Please cook the coconut!
I want that old-fashioned German chocolate cake icing, cooked the way Grandma Dorie used to make it. That’s the taste I remember, and that’s the one I still wish I could have again. I know I can’t go back to those birthday celebrations. I can’t stand in the kitchen with Grandma Dorie and watch her cook that icing over the stove. And I can’t ask Lynn to make our wedding cake again.
But I can remember them. I can remember the birthdays, the cakes, the people who tried to make something special for me, and the little boy who thought a whole cake under the kitchen table was a perfectly good idea. And I can be thankful for every one of those memories.
National Dessert Day is a good excuse to enjoy a favorite treat, but for me, this story is about more than cake. It’s about my grandmother, who knew exactly how I liked my birthday cake. It’s about my mom, Aunt Bobby, and my sister trying to carry on that tradition when Dortie couldn’t. It’s about David choosing German chocolate cake for our wedding. And it’s about Lynn taking the time to make that cake for us.
They may not have made every cake exactly the way I wanted it, but they made them with the intention of doing something special for me. And now that some of those people are no longer here, I realize how much those moments mean to and also to David and even Charlie.
So, on National Dessert Day, think about the dessert that takes you back. Maybe it’s your grandmother’s pie, your mom’s cookies, a birthday cake from childhood, or a special treat someone made just for you. If you still have the person who makes that favorite dessert, tell them how much you appreciate it. Ask for the recipe. Sit in the kitchen with them while they make it. Take pictures, share stories, and enjoy the time you have together.
Because one day, you may find that what you miss most isn’t just the dessert. It’s the person who made it. And if you’re ever making a German chocolate cake for me, remember Grandma Dorie’s rule: cook that coconut icing!
Grandma Dory’s Kind of German Chocolate Cake– This classic German chocolate cake recipe uses Baker’s German’s Sweet Chocolate and a traditional cooked coconut-pecan frosting. It’s inspired by the old-fashioned cake Grandma Dorie made for my birthdays. My favorite part was always the frosting, especially when the coconut was cooked just right!
Prep time: About 30 minutes Bake time: 30 minutes Cooling time: About 1 hour
Makes: One three-layer, 9-inch cake
Ingredients for the cake
1 package (4 ounces) Baker’s German’s Sweet Chocolate
½ cup water
1 cup butter, softened
2 cups sugar
4 eggs, separated
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
¼ teaspoon salt
1 cup buttermilk
Ingredients for the coconut-pecan frosting
4 egg yolks
1 can (12 ounces) evaporated milk
1½ cups sugar
¾ cup butter, cut into pieces
1½ teaspoons vanilla extract
2⅔ cups sweetened flaked coconut
1½ cups chopped pecans
Directions for the cake
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Grease three 9-inch round cake pans and line the bottoms with parchment paper.
Melt the chocolate with the water, stirring until smooth. Set aside to cool slightly.
Beat the egg whites in a clean bowl until stiff peaks form. Set aside.
In a separate bowl, combine the flour, baking soda, and salt.
In a large mixing bowl, beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the egg yolks one at a time, beating well after each addition.
Mix in the melted chocolate and vanilla.
Add the flour mixture alternately with the buttermilk, mixing after each addition.
Gently fold in the beaten egg whites.
Divide the batter evenly among the three pans. Bake for about 30 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.
Cool the cakes in their pans for 15 minutes. Remove them from the pans and let them cool completely on wire racks.
Directions for the cooked coconut-pecan frosting
Whisk the egg yolks and evaporated milk together in a large saucepan.
Add the sugar and butter.
Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, for about 12 minutes or until the mixture thickens and turns golden brown.
Remove the pan from the heat. Stir in the vanilla, coconut, and chopped pecans.
Allow the frosting to cool until it reaches a spreadable consistency.
Spread the frosting between the cake layers and over the top.
Grandma Dorie’s reminder: The frosting is cooked on the stove, but the coconut goes in near the end. Let the frosting cook until it’s properly thickened and the coconut has softened to your liking. Stir constantly so it doesn’t scorch.
Grandma Dory’s Kind of German Chocolate Cake
An old-fashioned chocolate cake with cooked coconut-pecan frosting
Cooling: About 1 hour | Makes: One three-layer, 9-inch cake
This classic cake is inspired by the birthday cakes Grandma Dory made for me. The frosting is cooked on the stove, and the coconut softens as the frosting thickens. That’s the way I remember it!
Ingredients for the Cake
- 1 package (4 ounces) Baker’s German’s Sweet Chocolate
- 1/2 cup water
- 1 cup butter, softened
- 2 cups sugar
- 4 eggs, separated
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 2 cups all-purpose flour
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 1 cup buttermilk
Ingredients for the Frosting
- 4 egg yolks
- 1 can (12 ounces) evaporated milk
- 1 1/2 cups sugar
- 3/4 cup butter, cut into pieces
- 1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- 2 2/3 cups sweetened flaked coconut
- 1 1/2 cups chopped pecans
Directions for the Cake
- Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease three 9-inch cake pans and line the bottoms with parchment paper.
- Melt the chocolate with the water, stirring until smooth. Cool slightly.
- Beat the egg whites in a clean bowl until stiff peaks form. Set aside.
- Combine the flour, baking soda, and salt in a separate bowl.
- Beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the egg yolks one at a time, beating well.
- Mix in the melted chocolate and vanilla.
- Add the flour mixture alternately with the buttermilk, mixing after each addition.
- Gently fold in the beaten egg whites.
- Divide the batter among the pans. Bake about 30 minutes, until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
- Cool in the pans for 15 minutes. Turn out onto wire racks and cool completely.
Directions for the Cooked Coconut-Pecan Frosting
- Whisk the egg yolks and evaporated milk together in a large saucepan.
- Add the sugar and butter.
- Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, for about 12 minutes or until the mixture thickens and turns golden brown. Do not let it scorch.
- Remove from the heat. Stir in the vanilla, coconut, and pecans.
- Cool until the frosting is thick enough to spread.
- Spread between the cooled cake layers and over the top.
This is a classic-style recipe inspired by the traditional cake, not a transcription of Grandma Dory’s exact recipe.
GreatfulMoments.com
Grateful, Thankful, and Blessed.
A little family note This is the kind of German chocolate cake that brings back memories of birthdays, family kitchens, and the people who made those days special. It may not be Grandma Dorie’s exact handwritten recipe, but I hope it inspires you to make a cake, share a slice with someone you love, and create a few sweet memories of your own.
And if you’re making it for me, please cook that coconut!
I sure wish I had a slice this morning with a glass of cold Milk. How about you?
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
