Here we are with Part D you can find part A and B and C here if you missed them. As we move into Part D I wanted to let you know that after everything that happened in Oklahoma, we would come home and have a chance to breathe.

But that’s not exactly what happened. We came home to a whole new set of worries and all I can do is place it into the LORDs hands which I plan on doing without a doubt. I just need to get the other’s on board.

Our landlord is going to be gone on maternity leave for three months, and that means things are changing again. And then there is the issue of getting the money together that we need before the next deadline.

Right now, I honestly don’t know how we’re going to do it. There are bills that have to be paid. There are things that have to be finished. All I can do is place things in the LORDs hands.

David has to continue working when he can, and there are things that have to be done before he can be away from work at the airport. Now, we’re sitting here trying to figure out where the money is going to come from and what we’re supposed to do next.

And that’s when you start thinking about all the possibilities. Could he work Uber or could he do DoorDash? Then I wonder if he can find something here and there to bring in enough extra money to keep us going?

This morning, I started making calls and one of the hardest parts is realizing that there isn’t some magical program that’s just going to come along and fix everything. Charlie hasn’t tried to get unemployment because he says he wouldn’t be able to get approved and will not even try and on top of that neither will Gerald. That is for the BIRDS!

Charlie hasn’t been able to find anything else that’s simply going to fill the gap. David isn’t either so again its all falling on David and I don’t know what is going to happen which isn’t fair.

The bills don’t stop because you’re struggling and the gas tank still needs gas. The refrigerator still needs groceries and the house still needs things. And then, just to add one more thing to the list, our internet gets turned off until midnight.

Thankfully, we were able to get that taken care of, and I’m grateful for that blessing. But when you’re already stretched thin, every unexpected expense feels enormous. And then there’s Charlie.

He’s still staying up all night and not sleeping the way he should and I’m trying to keep everything together and I’m trying to work on the blog. I’m trying to pick up enough posts to help financially, but I know it’s not going to solve everything overnight.

And that’s the part that scares me. Because when you look at everything at once, it feels impossible and there isn’t enough money for gas. There isn’t enough money for groceries. There are bills coming due.

There are things that need to be taken care of and I’m sitting here thinking, Where are we supposed to go from here? I wish I had an answer. I wish I could tell you that I have a five-step plan and everything is going to be okay.

But I don’t but what I do have is my faith. And after everything that happened in Oklahoma, maybe that’s the biggest lesson I’m supposed to be learning all over again. I can’t see what’s ahead. But God can.

I couldn’t see what was waiting for us in Oklahoma and I couldn’t understand why I woke up that morning with that uneasy feeling. I couldn’t understand why the plans kept changing.

I couldn’t understand why Charlie volunteered to take Junior, why Bradley backed out, or why David ended up going with me. But now I can look back and see that God was moving things around for a reason. And maybe He’s doing the same thing now.

Maybe I don’t need to understand the whole picture. Maybe I just need to take the next step. So today, I’m sitting here with a lot of questions. I’m worried and I’m frustrated. I’m scared and I’m tired.

And yes, sometimes I just want to sit down and cry. But I’m also reminding myself that I’ve been here before. And God has brought me through things I never thought I could get through.

So I’m putting this one in the Lord’s hands too. Because I know one thing for certain: Placing our problems in God’s hands doesn’t mean the problems disappear overnight it just means they will be handled in his time in his way.

It means we don’t have to carry them alone. I don’t know where the money is going to come from and I don’t know exactly what the next few months are going to look like. I don’t know what doors God is going to open. But I know He has opened doors for us before.

And I believe He can do it again. So for now, I’m going to keep praying. I’m going to keep working. I’m going to keep making the calls and I’m going to keep looking for ways to bring in a little extra money as I keep believing in the LORD.

And I’m going to keep reminding myself that God is still God—even when the bank account doesn’t look like it, even when the bills are piling up, and even when I don’t have the slightest idea what we’re supposed to do next.

Maybe that’s where faith really begins. Not when everything is okay. But when everything feels like it’s falling apart and you can still whisper, “Lord, I don’t know what to do. But I know You do.” And that’s where I am today and that is why I am grateful, thankful and blessed for the Lord and this life I have.

Grateful, Thankful, Blessed.

Thank you,

Glenda, Charlie and David Cates